Writing About My Fear Gave Me Clarity, Confidence

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Earlier today I wrote the post, Phone Phobia. It was a very personal story, to which I am not accustomed writing.

It was obviously an important exercise for me, because it helped me analyze things that I’d never consciously thought about before. All day long it was like different pieces of a puzzle kept coming into place.

It gave me power over my anxiety. I’m a strong person. I’m not going to let some ridiculous phone make me feel like that anymore. I know my mind is powerful, but I control my mind.

Other amazing things happened today after I published that post. I reached out to someone I haven’t spoken to on the phone in 3 years. Someone I really need to keep in touch with, but always wimped out before I dialed. Granted, I didn’t call him today, either. I texted him and he called me…but I made it happen.

Then, the doctor’s office, which prompted this whole ordeal earlier today, called me back. She actually asked the doctor my question, called me, and then offered to do me a huge favor. She personally brought the paperwork down to my car so that I didn’t have to park in the garage on the other side of the medical campus. This lady that I was so scared of talking to just offered me this huge favor!

Do you know that I don’t call people on their birthday, almost ever? Probably because I’m nervous about what to talk about with someone that I don’t speak with that often, or that I’m interrupting their celebration. That’s about to change. It was someone special’s birthday today and I made sure that I got on the phone with her.

And finally, when I was at another appointment this afternoon, the receptionist, out of the blue, starts telling me this story,

“Do you ever think you put an appointment in your phone and then it’s just not there? I have my hair cut every 6 weeks, and I always think I put it in my calendar. And then I can never find the appointment. And I feel so bad always having to call my hairdresser and ask her when it is. So last week, I was sure that my appointment was that same day and I felt so awful. I made my mom call the hairdresser for me. I just couldn’t bear the embarrassment of calling again.”

A totally unprompted story (from a very professional woman in her 50s) to show me that I’m not alone? Not to get all cosmic on you or anything, but it’s like the universe was rewarding me for my actions today. Writing about my fears only gave me more confidence. Crazy.

Photo credit: Flickr, cipher

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